


Because one event can change quite a few things

by ArrowHead74



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Arrow (TV 2012) RPF
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-08
Updated: 2014-02-06
Packaged: 2018-01-08 01:01:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1126514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArrowHead74/pseuds/ArrowHead74
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SPOILERS 2x06. Olicity. "After their trip in Russia, relations between Oliver and Felicity are strained but when Felicity finds herself in a dangerous situation, things go different"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1 : 

" The remainder of our faults is our most trusted companion"

Oliver's point of view:

There are moments in life where you make mistakes. Everybody faces this one moment of their lives. And I can already hear you saying: Everybody makes mistakes. I will respond -without a doubt- that you are right. But there is a BUT. I have always thought there are two types of mistakes. The first category consists of all those small mistakes that are not really important. You make those every day, and they don't really have an effect on your life. But the others, those have quite a different impact on your life and your future. Today, I made one that belonged in the second category. Because I consider our stay in Russia and everything that happened there as a mistake. One that doesn't belong with the small category. Of course, you can always try to find an excuse for what you did, some more valid than others. In my case? I have tried each and every excuse I can come up with. 1) What happened with Isabel wasn't only my fault. 2) That the amount of alcohol I drank that evening made it sort of happen. 3) That the worry and the stress from the mission made me do things I didn't really want to do. But you can try to come up with excuses, it doesn't work. Because what happened was my mistake. It's time for me to admit it.

I think things would be easier if it was only about MY mind, and MY regrets. But it doesn't matter if I want it or not, it isn't just about me and Isabel anymore. It is about HER. Felicity. Since we returned, things have been complicated between the two of us. Tension. That is the only word I can come up with to express what is happening between her and me. The day after our return to Starling City, I have found her at her desk, busily tapping away on her keyboard. I walked past her desk and she made sure she didn't look up, so she ignored me walking by. I wanted to stop, walk closer to her to force her to look at me and say her something, to say to her that I was sorry. To make her understand that I regretted everything that happened. But I didn't do it. Because I didn't know how to do it. To tell you the truth, I was afraid. Afraid to see that look in her eyes again, the look she gave me when she stood in front of the hotel door. A mixture of sadness and betrayal.

Since then, life at the office, a life we pretended was banal, was different. I didn't hear her stumbling over her own sentences when she didn't agree with me. And I didn't hear her obstinately refusing to get coffee when I had visitors. No. On the contrary. The only thing I heard was the tapping noise of her fingers on the keyboard, a constant sound. And in the worst case, there was silence. A heavy and unbearable silence. She brought coffee without complaining or looking at me. She gave a small smile at my visitor before leaving the room and closing the door. That was it. And when I risked walking up to her desk to ask her to post something, or to schedule a meeting, her response was always the same : « Fine » And the worst of it was, that I knew that one time, we have to, no I HAVE to get a grip on the situation and talk to her. Privately.

Felicity's point of view:

For days and days, I have tried everything to evade Oliver. I did my job, one where I worked for Oliver Queen and the other where I worked for the vigilante. That's all. Above all, even if I felt bad that day, I don't think quitting my job at Queen Consolidated was the solution. For a reason I didn't know. Well, no,not really. I know why it isn't the solution. Because I can't let just leave this alone and despite the fact that I tried to convince myself of the contrary, I couldn't help but hate it and I ended up with my feelings all jumbled. And that's why I evaded them. And the other reason was that every time I thought about it, I remembered the look in his eyes. When I remember it, I am in Russia once again, and everything that had happened came to my mind. I see myself standing naively at the door, I see him, looking surprised to see me when he opened the door, and then: HER, leaving the room and looking at me in a triumphant way, her tight dress still half unzipped on the back. At that moment, the only thing I tried to say was something like « what happened in Russia stays in Russia » I lied. Because it doesn't work like that. I can't just simply forget what I saw, and it is even harder to forget the feeling I had when I understood what had happened. The feeling that my heart was about to shatter. Just as ridiculous as it sounds.

Because even if I have had doubts about it, it was evident Oliver didn't share the feelings I had for him. It was just me. Well done Felicity. It was bound to happen because you fell for the most unattainable man on earth.

I did everything to evade him as much as possible : in the office, in the elevator and when we met up at the lair, I was careful not to talk to him unless it was necessary. Like explaining things to him. If I didn't have to give any information, I listened to him talking with Diggle, that is when I don't succeed in focusing on my work. I have to say that work has become my nr. 1 priority. I passed most of my time in the lair doing research and formatting about everything that could be formatted on the computers. I did that to make sure I didn't get in one of those moments where you start to think about every single thing that you shouldn't think about. Sleeping has become a difficult task, and admittedly, I didn't want to sleep, not if it means having to risk dreaming of Oliver Queen. But I couldn't do that much longer

The day everything started to topple, I went back to Verdant to do research. Again. The words on the screens started to dance in front of my eyes but I know what I was doing and even though being ill isn't something that happens a lot to me, I did know that I feel strange. What is better than getting the flu, right? From the moment I arrived Diggle has given me one of his famous worried looks. He gave me that look every day now. I bet he doesn't understand what was happening.

Everything that has happened in Russia has stayed between Oliver and me, so I guess you can say that Diggle didn't know what has happened there. And I really didn't want him to know. Focusing on the computer, I put my hand on my temple, there where I feel the pain pricking. I knew that Diggle was watching at me and I turned my head to him without saying a word;

-You should rest, he said to me. You need to sleep.

The look he gave me was one that doesn't accept no for an answer. Sighing, I got up from my chair, slightly wobbly on my feet and walked to the couch. I thought about sleeping, and the next moment I woke up in a lying position. I remembered finding myself in a strange dream. I don't know exactly what happened in it but I remembered feeling insecure and fear, a strange mixture of both. It was like someone was watching at me without permission. I don't know exactly how long I have been in between sleeping and being awake, but there is one thing that wakes me up immediately. The first thing I saw when I repositioned myself on the couch was Oliver, he faced me, one hand on my shoulder and a worried look on his face. When I regained enough of my wits to understand what was happening with Oliver and all, I stood up from the couch and at the same time shrugging his hand off my shoulder and walking past him without saying a word. That would have worked if he didn't grab my arm to stop me. I close my eyes, refusing to meet his.

-Go home, Felicity.

-I am doing very well, I replied in a cold manner.

-You are burning with fever. Go home and rest.

I ignored his remark and removed his hand from my arm and took a couple of steps before taking a seat in front of the computer screens. At that moment where I positioned my hands above the keyboard, Oliver turned the chair so that we face one another.

-That wasn't a suggestion. I want you to go home, take a couple of days and get some rest.

-I have work to do! I protested and again brought my hand to the side of my head when a pain hits that was stronger than the last one.

Despite that, I could vaguely hear Oliver asking Diggle to drive me home. I stood up, grabbed my handbag and started to leave;

-I can drive and I…

At the moment I turned to Oliver, I felt my head spinning like a merry go round. In vain, I tried to walk a few steps but I had the impression my body refused to obey to the orders my brain gave it. I hear Oliver's voice, seeming very far away;

-Felicity? Are you okay? Hey!

I didn't have enough time to responds and before I could understand what was happening, I felt my body falling to the ground. The last thing I saw before losing consciousness was Oliver rushing toward me and calling my name.


	2. Chapter 2

When I regained consciousness, I found myself lying on the long metallic table in the centre of the room with a blanket draped over me. Have I told you before that I hate that table ? Every time I see it, it reminds me of the day I was more or less forced to assist Diggle to clean up Oliver's bullet wound. Bweuk. Turning my head to the side, I could make out Diggle and Oliver standing on the other side of the room, talking in hushed voices. Despite my many efforts, I have never been any good in the art of lip-reading and I didn't understand what they were saying. Both of them immediately turned to me when I tentatively tried to move. In a faction of a second, they stood next to me.

« Hey »…Oliver started « how do you feel ? »

He was talking with that soft voice he used when he was worried and if the situation wasn't that complicated at the moment, I would certainly have been touched by his concern. But today, that wasn't the case. I was stubborn, stupid, yes, I admit it, but I refused to believe in him pretending to be worried about me after…after THAT.

« I am fine », I responded, my voice way colder than I meant it when I started to speak.  
I tried to get up, without success. The muscles in my body were heavy with tension. And despite the effort I put into it, getting up seemed to be an impossible task. It was like being sick, I always refused to admit I was. Without question. And especially now when the situation at hand was already complicated enough.

« Help me », I asked, turning my head to Diggle.

His eyes found Oliver's. Incomprehension and surprise is what I saw in them. But he didn't say a thing and simply walked up to me and murmured « Of course » before slipping an arm around my shoulders to pick me up gently. After taking a breath, I was capable of untangling my legs and get myself in a comfortable position. Diggle observed me anxiously. I turned my head toward him and gave him a smile and with a nod of my head I let him know that he could set me down. My head spined again and I prayed I will not lose consciousness again. Especially NOT now. Without looking, I knew Oliver was observing me, but he didn't say anything. I saw him walk toward the computers and start collection my things, starting with my bag.

«Oliver, can you tell me what exactly you are doing? » I asked

He didn't answer before he stood next to me again.

-I'm taking you to the hospital.

The hospital? No, out of the question. That was perhaps childish and completely bonkers, but I have always hated those, ever since I was a child; bad memories, I suppose. And the simple idea of seeing all those people in white coats, the needles and other instruments that I don't know the use of are enough to make me panic.

« No ! » I responded immediately.

« Felicity! You fainted and were unconscious for about 40 minutes and that isn't going to continue like that » he pointed out.

Not without first making sure my legs could hold my weight, I let myself slip off the table to go stand in front of him, proving to him that I was able to stand and that I was fine, well, sort of.

« Oliver, it's nothing, okay? I must be…tired and I must have eaten something that made my stomach upset. That's all. It is useless to worry about nothing! »

I would have liked Diggle's support in this matter but that doesn't work the way I wanted it.

« He is right Felicity, it must be something serious. You have to go, just to make sure everything is okay »

« I am not going. It is my life and I am free to decide what I do or don't ! »

I saw Oliver sigh and putting my stuff on the table next to me.

« One more thing and I am taking you there, if you want it or not, he adds »

I shook my head without saying anything else. It was useless to try to argue with something like that. It didn't end up in an argument between him and me because it is useless to argue now, when things are already complicated.

« If you refuse to go, let me at least take a bit of your blood. I know someone who works in a lab who can give us the results before tomorrow. Then everybody is reassured » said Diggle and walked toward me.

« Okay » I nodded, « because now I am assured of the fact that I will go home after that »

Diggle placed me, once again, on the table and prepared the material, all under Oliver's supervision. I made sure not to look into his eyes because I knew very well what he thought. That I shouldn't do this, that I should go to a hospital to make sure I was perfectly fine. And feeling the worried looks he doesn't fail to give me, I knew that he is way more worried then he lets on. Diggle told me not to look when he slides the needle inside my arm. I tried to think of other things. Think of everything apart from the needle in my arm and Oliver. Two things I absolutely refused to think about at this moment. When it was done, he let me stand up and I started to gather my things, ready to leave. But I didn't count on Oliver, who insisted that Diggle should bring me home.

Oliver's point of view:

I insisted that she should let us bring her home. To my surprise, she accepted without saying something about being perfectly fine. This was harder than I ever imagined. Why? For the simple reason that the tension between the two of us hung in the car. Neither one of us said something, because I should do that actually, but Diggle's presence made that impossible. But Diggle wasn't just a victim of the situation, he never ceased to look at me in that strange way of him, the look that let me know he understood everything that had and is happening between me and Felicity. When cross his eyes, I turn my head to the other side, to make sure that I won't need to give him an explanation. But to be honest, I can't keep evading the inevitable. When we arrived at her house, I waited until I hear her slam the car door shut, but that never happens. Instead, I looked at her sitting in the back of the car. I tried to assure myself that she was okay but Diggle prevented me from asking with a gesture of his hand.  
« She is okay Oliver, she's sleeping »

He was right. I decided to not wake her and I asked Diggle to park the car in front of the exit and I opened the back door. I slided inside the chair in the back of the car and slipped one hand around her legs, the other on her back to get her out of the car. She groaned a couple of seconds, turning her head toward me without waking up. I watched her sleep in my arms and asked myself what would happen if she would open her eyes. This sort of question wouldn't have crossed my mind a week before, because then, I wouldn't be worried about her, I wouldn't have worried about her waking up in my arms.

Because before, she would certainly said something inappropriate and make me smile. Today, things were different. Taking care I made no sudden movements that might wake her, I entered the apartment building, and minutes later, put her on her bed. After that, I put a blanket around her. I observed her for a couple of seconds and thought about all the things I had to tell her when this is over, and I left the apartment.

Felicity's point of view:

In the morning, I woke up without much pain, well, without much pain signifies the same as stiff muscles like the morning before. I dicn't remember much of yesterday, not after we left Verdant in the Queen's limousine. I woke up in the morning, in my own bed, in my apartment. That was all I knew of yesterday. When I get out of bed, I really thought that everything that must have happened yesterday didn't happen. I was mistaken. I understood it the moment I saw my own reflection in the mirror. Also the pain I felt while moving and the headache that didn't go away, the red spots that started to appear on my skin, from the base of my troath to my chest. Great. Beside food poisoning, it seems I have some sort of allergic reaction to deal with. Just great. I don't feel like staying inside, watching television with a pint of ice in my hands, I decide to go to Verdant and I make sure to put a scarf on to hide the red spots. Oliver worries enough and it is useless to give him another reason. And risking that he will truly take me to a hospital, I decided to hide everything.

When I arrived at Verdant, an hour to late that is, Diggle and Oliver watched me, observing my every gesture and I gave them a « everything is okay » to convince them and me at the same time. Because I knew I was not all right. But I refused to give in to it, despite everything. I skipped lunch break to do as if I was doing okay, busy with my task as every other day. Diggle and Oliver discussed the next mission to come and then I heard Diggle, announcing that he will get the results from the lab and after that adding that he won't be long.

I didn't really focus on that, too busy concentrating on my breathing and the nausea that comes way too often. I have managed to not make them suspicious for a couple of hours, but I can't do that much longer. I was thinking of an excuse to leave the place when Oliver approached me and stood behind my chair.

-Felicity, we need to talk.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys ! Thank you for all the kudos ! :) Here is the next chapter ! :) Please, let me know what you think :) Laura

Oliver’s point of view:

There are moments in life where you have to make choices, and I am not talking about the easy choices. I am talking about the sort of choices you have to think about for a couple of minutes, to weigh the cons and pros, without knowing exactly what to do. But you end up making a decision anyway.  Because you feel like you need to do it and you don’t have another choice. That might be the reason life is complicated sometimes: because everything is in a way a matter of choice. 

The life I used to live didn’t seem complicated to me: I didn’t have any choices to make, or at least, I didn’t question myself about it. But since I returned from Lian Yu, things have become more complicated. Last night I found myself in such a situation, a situation where you have no idea what to do. The moment I closed Felicity’s apartment door, I felt the need to open it again, to stay at her apartment to watch her sleep until she wakes again. To make sure she is doing fine.  But the moment I wanted to do that, I found myself facing two choices to make: get inside and guard her until she wakes and by doing that, taking the risk that she doesn’t appreciate my presence, and in worst case scenario, staying clear of the subject both of us don’t want to stay clear of, or leave and wait until she comes back tomorrow morning and saying clear of the subject a bit longer, even though I have to talk about it if I want to or not. I ended up choosing the second option, without a doubt because that seemed the most reassuring one to me. I rejoined Diggle in the car, and once I was comfortable in the backseat of the car, he asked me how she was doing. I responded with two words that she was fine.  We were quiet for the most of the ride, until he decided to speak.

« What exactly happened between you two? »

I looked Diggle in the eye through the rearview mirror and he responded by looking away, trough the window of the car. He wasn't dumb and he clearly did notice the coldness between Felicity and I.

« Everything is fine, Diggle »

« Lying has never been your strong suit Oliver. It has been days since you two talked and you are evading the other so… »

« Everything is fine » I repeated, without a doubt more to convince myself than him.

Diggle didn’t ask any more questions. He didn’t say anything but something I already knew: « You two need to talk »

I spent the rest of the night patrolling Starling City, wearing the Hood, observing things that seemed strange to me, because you always want things to go in a certain way, but nothing happens the way you want it. I couldn’t think about anything else for a couple of minutes. In the end, I came to the conclusion that Diggle was right: I couldn’t hide from the things that were happening.  I had to talk to her and the sooner the better. Tomorrow seemed like the best option.  Only hours later, when Diggle and I were discussing our next mission, I heared Felicity walked through the door of the lair and walked down the stairs. I saw her walk to her computers without saying a word. She wasn't better. She looked tired and I didn’t even have time to say a word when she said that she was doing fine. I waited for the exact moment that Diggle said to us that he was leaving. I put my hands on the back of the chair she sitted in, and ended up saying something that sounded like a bad thing, coming from me: 

« Felicity, we need to talk »

Felicity’s point of view:

And there we had the thing I have been thinking about last couple of weeks, this discussion.  And I wasn’t sure when to expect it. But I didn’t want to hear it. Not now. I didn’t want to hear that, I didn’t want to hear what he had to say. I didn’t want to listen to his excuses that he will, without a doubt, tell me to explain what happened. Without precaution, I get up, my hand on the edge of the desk, to steady myself until I feel the wave of nausea that that bubbled up in me go away, and I walk away, and walk around him.

« If you want to stay clear of THAT subject, I beg you Oliver, if you care about me then please shut up! »

Believing that that would make him go away was a mistake.  I could hear him following me from the moment I walked away.

« Felicity, I didn’t want this to happen »

« Don’t do that! »I interrupted him, turned to face him and pointed my index finger at him. « Don’t tell me you didn’t want this! She didn’t fall into your bed by mistake Oliver! »

He couldn’t deny that. Since that happened, when I saw both of them and I understood what had happened, I tried everything not to let my imagination get the better of me. Why? Because I didn’t want to think about it, thinking about him and her. Not like that.

« It just…happened » he continued without noticing that I was thinking, « it just…happened. We both drank and… »

« Don’t blame it on the alcohol! You made that decision Oliver, you and no one else! I don’t know why we are talking about this, you are mature enough to know what you do and with whom you do that! I just thought you were…that you were better than that »

Nice way to turn things around Felicity, I thought.  Telling him that he hurt me was impossible. Because that would imply that I feel more for him than just admiration for the things he does for this city.  Feeling the tears in my eyes, I turned my back toward him. But in Oliver’s  world, that must mean something else because he put his hands on my shoulder and turned me around and took my head in his hands.

« Hey, I didn’t want that! » He repeated. « I didn’t want to hurt you. It is just that things are simple when…when you are with someone you don’t really care about. Because if something like that happens, it is never with someone I really care for »

I wanted to say something but then I noticed Oliver looking at my neck. I forgot the spots on my neck for an instant. With one hand, I readjusted my scarf. « Too late » I thought.

« Felicity… »he started to say.

« It is nothing, I replied immediately, without giving him time to continue. It is just an allergic reaction »

Without hesitating, he sticked out his hand to my scarf to get it off my neck. I didn’t protest.

« Since when? »

« This morning, but it is nothing and it is useless to worry about it. It is an allergic reaction »

At the moment he was going to say something, the nausea came back in my stomach. I quickly let go of him, one hand on my mouth whilst running toward the bathroom. But I didn’t make it to the bathroom and my stomach empties itself at the base of the stairs.  I noticed that it didn’t only consist of the little food I have eaten, but also blood. I felt panic rise in my throat and at the same time my body began to shudder. Oliver walked over to me and he sat next to me, one hand on my back.

« Felicity… »he began to say.

I didn’t want him to worry but I have already used all the ways I knew, and now I was out of ideas, without a doubt because I panicked. He gave me a tissue and I immediately cleaned my mouth, one hand still on my stomach and then I put my other hand on the first step of the stairs. Oliver brought a chair and helped me reach it, helped me sit up until the moment my back touched the back of the chair. I didn’t have time to say something because I felt his fingers on my wrist, taking my pulse. It was weak and I knew it. He looked at me, worry in his eyes.

« Did you eat anything unusual this last couple of days? Drank anything unusual? »  
I shook my head.  
« Not that I know of » I responded softly.

« Did you…go to an unusual place ? »

« Yes, to a bar » I thought « without a doubt to forget what I saw a few days earlier ». I didn’t say that. I tried to get up, but I felt his hand on my shoulder, forcing me to stay seated.

« Oliver, it is nothing, I just need a bit of rest, I… »

« It is not nothing » he interrupted me,  « Yesterday, you fainted and today you throw up blood. It is not nothing. « Felicity, you need to go to a doctor, you have to… »

« No! Oliver, I will do everything you ask, but not that! »

« I can’t do anything for you here, I can ‘t do anything, I don’t even know what happened! » He said to me and took my hands in his.

« Please…I asked him, tears reentering my eyes. « You..you, can’t you just ask Diggle if the test results are there yet. We have everything we need here. You asked me one day to not take you to a hospital and I didn’t do it…for you. Please », I repeated. 

He let go of my hands and walked away, to think. I wanted to ask him about it. I was sure I looked like a scared child, but it was true. I didn’t want to go there. At the same moment, I heard Diggle enter the sound of his heavy footfalls on the floor above us and I saw him appear at the base of the stairs a moment later.  His earnest look didn’t reassure me. Oliver approached Diggle and I the moment he stepped into the room.

« I just came back from the lab. Felicity…you were poisoned. Arsenic »

I needed a few seconds to respond to that and at the same time Oliver stepped closer without saying a word. Poisoned? How was that possible? I couldn’t be. Not possible.

« Diggle, that is impossible. And even if it were possible,  I mean , why? Why me? »

« I don’t know, but it is serious. You need to be treated immediately. In a couple of hours, 24 at the most, the symptoms will only get worse, first vomiting, convulsions, and hallucinations and then…you die. That will happen if we don’t do anything about it. »

I saw Oliver returned, a glass of water in his hand. He didn’t miss anything of that conversation, I was certain of it. The moment he turned to face me, I knew what he was going to say. I interrupted him before he could even say it.  
« No, don’t say it. I am not going there. We have everything we need right here. We don’t need a hospital » I weakly argued.

« We can treat almost anything, except poisoning »

« The herbs, the ones you brought from the island. They might… »

I saw him shake his head.

« I am not certain and I don’t want to take that risk » 

« Try it, please. If it doesn’t work then…then I’ll go »

I saw him sigh and closed his eyes for a few seconds. He was thinking. But Diggle kept his eyes fixed on Oliver. The decision wasn’t his to make. Oliver finally opened his eyes and looked at me. He gave me the glass of water, which I took with one shaking hand.

« Drink » he simply told me.

I accepted and brought the glass to my lips and drank a few sips. I wanted to put down the glass but he said « a bit more » . I did so, forcing myself to swallow, just to prove to him that I was doing better than it seemed. Lie. I had come to the conclusion that he decided to not take me to the hospital. I was wrong. After putting the glass down, I got up with great difficulty and I started to take a few steps. The two men were watching me and I felt my head spinning even more than it did before. Oliver’s arm circled around my waist and pulled me to him.

« Take it easy… »he advised me.

I didn’t understand. Everything was okay, no, better until… Everything fell into place in half a second. The water.

« Oliver, what..the water.. »

« I am sorry but I can’t let you do this. »

Oliver kept me from falling and helped me sit on the floor.

« Everything is going to be fine, I am here, with you »

I didn’t have enough strengh in me to reply. I just felt my eyes close at the moment the fatigue came over me. And then everything went black.

Oliver’s point of view:

I knew that wasn’t a good decision. I also knew that I couldn’t let her risk her life like that. She needed a doctor, immediately. And at the time I was talking about, I knew what was going to happen next. At the moment Felicity closed her eyes, I raised my head and looked at Diggle. He was worried, as I was. He nodded at the glass of water.

« A tranquilizer, really? She will get back at you for that »

I knew that, but her life was more important than anything else. I had made enough mistakes in the last few weeks and if she could accept my first excuses, than I think she could accept my second.


End file.
